From the Inside Out

I want my way. I always do. I'm like an obstinate child. I have these ups and downs. The ups are when I'm not driving, when I've given Him the wheel and I'm letting Him lead and take control.

I am so blessed. I have so much to be thankful for, yet I'm often so unsatisfied. I want my way. I always do.

I love going to vespers. I may no longer be a student at Southern, but I've always enjoyed vespers. The praise songs, the message, the chance to breathe after a long week.

I'm sleepy. I'm eating kiwis I bought on sale last week and listening to the sound of my kitty's collar bell as she wanders around the apartment. Today was nice. I painted. I napped.

God you are so good to me. I want to surrender everything to you. My will, Yours. Not I, but You Lord. I want a certain job, a certain guy, a certain whatever, but every time I try to do things my way, I fail. I ask for you to give me patience.

Thank you for loving me when I don't deserve it.
Thank you for guiding me when I've lost my way.
Thank you for protecting me when I'm in harm's way.
Thank you for blessing me.

I'm going to bed with a song in my heart and a prayer on my lips. I will be patient. I will let YOU lead.

From the Inside Out -Hillsong-

A thousand times I've failed
Still your mercy remains
And should I stumble again
Still I'm caught in your grace

Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame

My heart and my soul, I give You control
Consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise, become my embrace
To love You from the inside out

Your will above all else, my purpose remains
The art of losing myself in bringing you praise